“Between ages 13 and 18, girls’ confidence drops by 20%.” A startling statistic quoted on the Mission page on the website for Être Girls, an organization dedicated to help girls grow their confidence through mentorship. As a mother of a 13-year-old girl, I’ve noticed the stark change in my little girl as she begins to navigate a social landscape that is harsh towards young women. The girl who once joyously sang on stage now hesitates, second-guessing her voice, her body, and just about everything else. It’s heartbreaking to watch, but there’s hope. A special project called Poker Pioneers is stepping in for girls like her, unlocking the secrets of success for both high school and college aged students.
My daughter started her first day of high school today, appearing small and confused among a sea of older students. At the poker table, however, she’s a completely different creature. She runs bluffs against people twice her age with an inscrutable poker face. While I expected her to feel out of place on the first day, I know she’ll soon find her footing and reclaim her confidence, just like she does when we gather around the kitchen table to play poker with older women from our neighborhood. You see, there’s more than just tips about chips and cards that she’s learned through poker. Connecting with older women in our neighborhood around my kitchen table over a stack of chips affords her a comfortable and safe environment to hear stories, ask questions, and find a sense of belonging in the greater community.
This is the heart of Poker Pioneers. The program connects girls with exceptional mentors, offering them a chance to see the world through the lenses of data, intuition, and strategy—the very same tools that guide the world’s top poker players. In education, we’ve known for years that connection with a caring teacher is a predictor of academic success for all students, even more so than the curriculum itself or even the funding of the school program. Through Poker Pioneers, students have an opportunity to interview their mentors, gain firsthand wisdom, engage in thoughtful conversation, and be inspired.
At the end of the Poker Pioneers program, each student produces an article highlighting their findings and insights from their research. The student teases out the skills that Poker Power champions, such as problem-solving, confidence, and risk assessment. One student wrote about a particularly valuable poker skill: ‘Refusing to feel powerless.’ Ultimately, students come to see how a unique path to success can be achieved through the skills poker develops, helping players understand their own minds, motivations, and foibles.
Take for instance, Avery Nemo, an Être Girl, who interviewed Cardiologist and Associate Medicine Holly Andersen, who revealed that she brought her poker face to work. “Once you learn the craft of poker,” Andersen said, “you have to proceed in the calmest manner because that is when you act and think the best.” Andersen went on to describe how studying a patient’s body language and facial cues were skills that she mastered around the poker table. Similarly, Isabella Mandis interviewed venture capitalist and poker player Martina Welkhoff who started playing poker at the age of 15 for social reasons. “You get such an interesting microcosm at a poker table,” Welkhoff explains, “It really helps to sort of fast-track certain relationships because you get a sense of someone’s negotiation style.”
Poker has transformative power. While we can’t undo the societal pressures young women face overnight, Poker Pioneers is a step in the right direction. There will still be moments where the high school and college aged young women encounter insecurity and opposition, whether at a tough sporting event, a challenging computer science program, or the first day at a new school. The antidote to bruised confidence is connection. Strong women in poker help reject the pressure to lower their standards, to be lesser, and to give up their power. Together we can infuse the younger generations with the assurance they deserve to feel when trying something new or breaking the mould in male-dominated industries.
Stay tuned for next week’s article where we’ll be sharing more inspiring stories from girls like Avery Nemo, who have been profoundly impacted by their experiences in the Poker Pioneers program.
Written by Dr. Alexandra Doc Chauran
